Kaleem Joy, Licensed Midwife
Who are you inviting to your birth?
You're going to give birth and how that occurs is life changing for you and the baby. Natural childbirth, medicated childbirth or unmedicated childbirth, the key word is BIRTH. Who is the person you are inviting to your birth? You may think I am talking about people like your partner, husband, mother, sister or care provider. I am really talking about YOU!
Who you become during your pregnancy is who you will invite to your birth.
So many people think that all they need to do is read a book or take a class at the end of the pregnancy to get "prepared" to give birth. Many people also say " well I can just have an epidural if I can't handle it". Somehow that is not exactly the mindset you want when you have a baby. There will be times when your baby may be up all night due to a fever and you will be comforting them and holding them all night. You can't just put them down and say " I am going to go sleep, I'm tired" and just let them cry alone all night.
Let me challenge the thinking and open a new box. What if the growing belly is really more than just growing the baby. Pregnancy is a time of growth and change in all areas of your life. Physically it's obvious that your body is changing just like your baby's. Mentally and emotionally it is as well. These are super important to the mindset needed for birth to go smoothly. Your life is expanding into a new life, just like your baby is.
What can you do to learn about the beliefs you have had all your life and see if these are what you really want to carry into your birth. Do you want to instill them in your children through your parenting? Lean in... I want to share a little of what you can do.
Throughout your life you have lived with habits. Some that have been good to you and others maybe not. Learning to see what they are, allows you to make purposeful changes. If your nutrition has been an area needing upleveling, pregnancy is going to show you it's time to take notice and make changes. If you have had a pain in your back, pregnancy will insist you pay attention and get the help to resolve it. If your on the anxious side of things, pregnancy will tell you it's time to learn a new way of thinking and feeling.
Some people let pregnancy, life, birth and so one, just decide for them what will happen or by default. People who want to improve their life choose to do so by designing what they want and how they will give birth to the experience they desire. What this also creates, is a future of a better life for you and your baby past birth.
Begin today by writing down what you really want to experience for you birth. Imagine you are telling your best friend about it afterwards. Describe it in detail and feel how good it feels to live that story. Then ask yourself why you want your birth to be this way. Why would your baby want their birth to be like this. Ask yourself who you want to invite to your birth. Then look at what it will take on a daily basis to become that person. Baby steps each day, don't try to tackle it all at once.
When you become your best self during pregnancy, increasing more gratitude, self-worth, confidence, determination, you set the seeds for a better birth and your baby will benefit from all of this as you parent them.
I created my Natural Childbirth 101 programs to help you walk the journey with the best information and support to create the experience you truly desire. Check out my programs and see what they can offer your life.